Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants?
In case they got a hole in one.
Why it works
Double meaning. A hole in one is a golf achievement; pants can also develop a literal hole.
Athletic Groan Commission
Clean sports jokes covering golf, baseball, tennis, soccer, bowling, hockey, running, and competitive wordplay.
Sports vocabulary is already metaphorical: teams break records, players serve, runners draw even, games are tied, and plans produce curveballs. A sports joke lets the literal and figurative contests meet on the same field.
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Collected specimens
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Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants?
In case they got a hole in one.
Double meaning. A hole in one is a golf achievement; pants can also develop a literal hole.
Why was the baseball stadium so cool?
It was full of fans.
Double meaning. Fans can be spectators or machines that circulate air.
What is a tennis player’s favorite kind of relationship?
Love–love.
Specialized meaning. In tennis, “love” means zero, so love–love is a possible score as well as an affectionate pairing.
Why did the soccer ball quit the team?
It was tired of being kicked around.
Idiom. Being kicked around means being treated badly; a soccer ball is literally kicked repeatedly.
Why did the runner bring a pencil?
They wanted to draw even with the leader.
Idiom. To draw even means catch up in a race; pencils literally draw.
What did the bowling ball say after the game?
Give me a break—I did not have a spare moment.
Double meaning. A spare is a bowling score, while a spare moment is free time; a break is both rest and forceful separation.
Why did the basketball player visit the bank?
To improve their bounce rate.
Domain switch. Bounce rate is a web metric, while a basketball’s bounce is central to play.
Why did the referee bring string to the match?
They needed to tie up a close game.
Idiom. A tied game has equal scores; string ties objects together.
What is a swimmer’s favorite kind of music?
Anything with a good stroke.
Double meaning. A stroke is a swimming movement and can also describe how an instrument is played.
Why was the track so trustworthy?
It had a solid record.
Double meaning. A track record is a history of performance; an athletics track also hosts record-setting performances.
Why did the hockey player open a bakery?
They were excellent at icing.
Double meaning. Icing is a hockey violation and the sweet topping on baked goods.
What did the coach say to the broken vending machine?
Give me my quarterback.
Word boundary. “Quarterback” names a football position and can also mean returning a twenty-five-cent coin.
Why did the gymnast carry a ruler?
To measure how far they had bent the rules.
Idiom. Bending the rules means stretching what is permitted; gymnasts physically bend their bodies.
Why did the pitcher become a storyteller?
They knew how to deliver a good curve.
Double meaning. A curveball is a baseball pitch and an unexpected turn in a story.
Why did the chess player keep checking the clock?
They did not want their plans to get stale, mate.
Word boundary. “Stalemate” is split into “stale, mate,” turning a chess outcome into advice to a friend.
Why did the baseball glove become a counselor?
It was a good listener and caught everything.
Double meaning. Catching everything can mean noticing every detail, while catching a ball is a glove’s main purpose.
Why did the tennis racket apologize?
It had made an unforced error.
Specialized meaning. An unforced error is a tennis mistake not caused by an opponent; the phrase is treated as a social mistake requiring an apology.
Why did the soccer team visit the art museum?
They appreciated a good draw.
Double meaning. A draw is a tied match and also evokes the act of drawing in visual art.
Why did the bowler make a strong first impression?
The interview panel found them striking.
Double meaning. Striking can mean impressive, while a strike is a successful result in bowling.
Why did the swimmer volunteer to begin the meeting?
They were ready to dive right in.
Idiom. To dive right in means to begin eagerly, while swimmers literally dive into water.
Why did the runner carry a spare shoelace?
They hoped to tie the record.
Double meaning. To tie a record is to equal it, while a shoelace is literally tied.
Why did the goalkeeper study locksmithing?
They were already good at keeping things out.
Literal reading. A goalkeeper prevents balls from entering the goal, while locks keep unwanted things or people out.
Why did the volleyball player answer the office phone?
They were excellent at handling returns.
Double meaning. A return is a volleyball hit back across the net and also a call made in response to an earlier call.
Why did the cyclist lead the difficult training session?
They would not let the team coast.
Double meaning. To coast means to proceed with little effort, while a cyclist coasts by moving without pedaling.
Why did the referee carry a whistle into the library?
They knew exactly when to call for quiet.
Double meaning. Referees make calls using whistles, while calling for quiet means asking people to lower their voices.
Why did the baseball scorekeeper make a careful accountant?
They kept track of every run.
Domain switch. Accountants keep track of transactions, while a baseball scorekeeper records runs.
Why did the tennis net become a mediator?
It kept both sides connected without taking either side.
Perspective. A mediator remains neutral between two sides; a net divides the court while remaining part of the same match.
Why did the scoreboard proofread the team newsletter?
It wanted the final word count to be accurate.
Double meaning. Editors check a document's word count, while a scoreboard displays the final numerical count in a game.
Why did the goalkeeper become an accountant?
They were already good at making saves.
Double meaning. A goalkeeper makes saves by stopping shots; an accountant can help clients make financial savings.
Why did the coach carry a comma onto the field?
The team needed a brief time-out.
Domain switch. A comma creates a brief pause in a sentence, while a time-out pauses a game.
Why did the bowling team hire a mathematician?
It needed help splitting the difference.
Double meaning. Splitting the difference is finding a midpoint; in bowling, a split leaves separated pins.
Why did the swimmer train as an electrician?
They were comfortable working with the current.
Double meaning. Current is moving water for a swimmer and moving electric charge for an electrician.
Why did the jeweler watch every baseball game?
The diamond sometimes produced a real gem.
Double meaning. A baseball field is called a diamond, and a gem can be a jewel or an outstanding play.
Why did the cyclist welcome the new training plan?
They were geared for change.
Idiom. Being geared for change means being prepared for it; a bicycle literally uses gears.
Why did the gymnast become an editor?
They were flexible about form.
Double meaning. Form is the shape and technique of gymnastics or the organization and style of writing.
Why did the relay team deliver the urgent message?
They knew how to pass it along quickly.
Double meaning. Passing a message means relaying it; relay runners literally pass a baton.
Why did the fencer excel in debate club?
Every argument had a sharp point.
Double meaning. A sharp point is a persuasive idea and also the end of a fencing weapon.
Why was the hockey player's calendar always full?
It had too many ice dates.
Compound word. Ice dates sounds like scheduled hockey time and like dates specifically held on ice.
Why did the referee become a tailor?
They were used to measuring close calls.
Double meaning. Close calls are difficult officiating decisions, while a tailor makes precise close measurements.
Why did the golfer edit the long article?
They took several strokes off the final draft.
Double meaning. A stroke is a golf shot or a movement used to write and revise marks on a page.
Why did the marathon runner become a novelist?
They understood how to succeed in the long run.
Idiom. In the long run means over an extended period, while a marathon is literally a long run.
Adjacent departments
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42 reviewed specimens